Machete Maidens Unleashed! (2010)

Okay some of you are excited.. the title is a little misleading and 'all of that' at the same time. If you are of an age you remember the golden years of the Drive-In with their .75/carload exploitation double features. This is a documentary of Filipino genre film making.. Roger Corman and those guys. Really fascinating stuff told by those who were there in an interview style format (individually). Remember some titles you had mercifully forgotten or simply enjoy the historical aspect of a now dead genre despite Quentin Tarantino's desire to keep it alive. This is how 90% of people in film make a living kids so very educational, highly entertaining, and the comedic styling of Sid Haig is always a treat. If you are a movie geek like me this is a must see! Recommended.

The Tall Man (2012)

A rural Washington community is plagued by a story of a child abducting 'tall man'. This was a surprising watch for me.. when it started I was expecting a typical Hollyweird horror film, and indeed for about the first hour that's what it seemed to be, but some details started to seem out of place. This continued to build until the story line emerges as something totally different and more than a little shocking. It may sound like a tinfoil hat thing but its possible that what is portrayed actually happens! >cue Twilight Zone music< Rod Sterling: In this sleepy little town a crazy notion has just been given birth... lol. Gone Baby Gone (2007) meets Gone (2012). There is another older film I could tag but that would be too much a spoiler so it shall go unsaid.. if you seen it you will know which I am thinking of when you get to the end of this one. There is an extended scene between the 'yawn another slasher' and 'wait.. what the hell is going on?' you have to kind of muck (clue) through.. but once on the other side its all good stuff. You will definitely need your brain with you on this. Even though its tagged horror there isn't much scary in this one. Solid production value and a huge corkscrew of a non cheesy twist make this one worth seeing. Recommended.

Loving the Bad Man (2010)

A young woman who is raped not only forgives her violator (and gives birth to his bastard child) but seeks to lead him to his own salvation. Most of these Christian themed movies are pretty hokey when it comes to production value and delivery and this one is no exception. However if you can stick with it until it starts to grab you (about 30 minutes in for me) you will be treated to a hard hitting powerhouse. Not since Fireproof (2008) have I been so moved and elevated by a movie. This goes beyond simple mindless entertainment or feeding a thrill and speaks directly to your core. Very nourishing for the entire family. Highly Recommended.

The Dark Knight Rises (2012)

Director Nolan wraps up his Batman trilogy. Definitively the darkest of the bunch, this one combines the complex story arc of Batman Begins with all the flash and FX of The Dark Knight. While the Dark Knight is my hands down favorite of the 3, Rises is no slouch when it comes to all the elements that have made the prior 2 so well received. While it was easy to understand 7 years had passed in the first one (really only 7?), and the second one spans several months (not really all that important as far as the viewing goes), this one starts off 8 years later and THEN spans more than 5 months (the 5 month thing becomes important after a certain event), something that gets lost easily while being fairly important to understanding certain events. The story itself is top shelf, despite the cosmetic differences in Bane, he is for the most part the villain who was conceived in the Knightfall story arc. There is some compression and story mixing to kind of bring things full circle. Don't nit pick things too hard as the veneer is a little thin in a couple places (sometimes an unavoidable evil given time constraints and editing). Definitively worth seeing if you are a fan of the previous 2. Sorry no spoilers. Recommended.

Girls Gone Dead (2012)

Weekend party get-a-way turns into bloody massacre. You can sum this one up in a couple words.. camp, boobs, blood.. and sometimes that's enough. This title was notable to me based on the inclusion of Linnea Quigley and Ron Jeremy, if you know either of those names then this movie shouldn't make your brain explode. Unfortunately they both have bit roles completely unworthy of their particular talents. Pretty typical slasher style movie.. they manage to bring in a new weapon of choice (the war hammer) and create some lore around it.. nothing too complicated but something a little new to the genre. The movie itself is surprisingly well done from a mechanics standpoint, they either had some money to spend or have some real talent behind the scenes.. either way, B-movie and plastic titty fans should find something worthwhile in this one.. nothing earth shattering but better than the typical offering.

Ted (2012)

A childhood wish gives life to a teddy bear. Ted is Peter Griffin from Family Guy? Yup! Pretty funny for the first 20 minutes or so and has a nice wrap up but the filler is pretty weak potatoes. A nod goes out to Giovanni Ribisi for his over the top psycho character, talk about making the most of a very small role.. nice work! The rest of the movie is fairly formulaic, a little crude, but nothing not seen/heard before. I really had no desire to see this but during the first 20 minutes or so I thought I was going to be surprised with a real treat.. alas it was not to be so. Another testament to the sorry state of comedy these days.

The Raven (2012)

The last days of Edgar Allen Poe are filled with a murder mystery driven by his stories. I'm sad to say this is one of those Hollyweird formula movies. Basically this is From Hell (2001) seasoned with the new Sherlock Holmes offerings. They do a nice job of pitching the works of Poe so I'm wondering if one or more of the producers have acquired some of the rights. I imagine more than a few people will be buying some Poe compilations to make sense of some of the references. The movie itself is medium entertaining... my attention wandered here and there, but I still wanted to see where things were going. Overall its milquetoast. Sorry John.

The Amazing Spider-Man (2012)

Spiderman reboot. For those who live on Mars, High School loser gets bit by radioactive spider which gives him super powers. Right out of the box on this one they start exploring new avenues, most notably the fate of Peter's parents. Casting Martin Sheen as Uncle Ben does nothing to garner sympathy when he is killed (they change it so he dies for being a knucklehead, not hard to believe with Martin Sheen.. lol). Everything else is 'updated' to today's sort of wishy-washy Twilight like societal norms. This movie would be better titled The Amazing Peter Parker as the vast majority of the movie is told through the eyes of Peter and not Spiderman. I really really wanted to like this movie, the inclusion of the web shooters and the fact they left him small and skinny all pointed in a direction I was liking. Unfortunately it didn't come to amount to much as I was fairly bored through the lions share of 2 hours worth of film (you have seen all the good stuff in the trailers). The Lizard CGI was sorely lacking during the close-ups and they had too many of those. I think this may have been a committee movie.. too much material and not enough direction, lots of ideas and no convictions. A huge disappointing 'meh'.

Dark Shadows (2012)

Tim Burton interpretation of the venerable TV show of the same name. If you are unfamiliar this is kind of the late show version of Dallas. Old wealthy family headed up by a vampire with an ancient curse. If you are a fan of the Burton/Depp team there is no reason to think you won't enjoy this one as well. For me there were a few moments of brilliance surrounded by minutes and minutes of it could have been funny 2 decades ago. Not to say its a bad watch, far from it, but for me this formula is starting to get stale. I was a little disappointed in Depp's performance as well unless he was deliberately trying to pay tribute to the poor drunken sot who played the role initially (then I'm impressed.. lol). Okay I'm done dumping on it, for the good stuff the sets and atmosphere is typical Burton brilliant and the evil witch was really played well. I watched it twice already just to make sure I wasn't missing anything, probably once more before it gets flushed down the memory hole. Make a good movie night rental.

Collaborator (2011)

A visit to his mother finds a playwright being held as a hostage by his ex-con neighbor. Pretty interesting movie about a politically outspoken writer on a downward slide who finds his career salvaged by the downward spiral and death of his ex-con neighbor he knew as a child. Hollyweird never ceases to amaze me on its inability to connect with rank and file America through their characters. Their endless insistence that anyone pro American is 'right-wing' while rejecting that being anti American is 'left wing' is as mindless as it is inaccurate. Be that as it may they don't beat that drum too hard while doing a fair job of comparing the differences between those on the upper strata of society and those living on the bottom. All in all a fairly enjoyable and entertaining viewing experience.

Margaret (2011)

An upper class teen-age girl witnesses a fatal bus accident. This is a well done movie and all players for the most part do well. A strident drama about guilt and the need for revenge. The story is well done but fairly pointless. Personally I didn't like this one at all.. all those bitches are fucking crazy! It showcases everything shitty about the human condition from my perspective and the NYC Jewish women screeching during the last half of the movie was more than I could take. This thing was a soap opera on steroids! None for me thanks.

The Shrine (2010)

A report of a missing hiker sends a trio of journalists into the old world backwoods seeking clues. This is one you really need to stick with for the payoff. Try to keep the first scene in mind when you are bored to tears watching nearly every mindless cliche' and stupid move and dry worn out dialogue... they get to the statue and things still don't improve despite the momentary cool break in the monotony. BUT.. if you can stick with it you will be rewarded in the final 3rd of the film. Remember that first scene? Well if you can make it until you see it again you will be in for a treat. The ending of the movie is well worth seeing as things get insanely violent and demonic. If this pops up on cable and you have nothing better to do this wouldn't be a waste of your time.. there are moments I would compare favorably to The Evil Dead (1981) but they are short lived (about the last 10 minutes of the movie).

Salmon Fishing in the Yemen (2011)

A pie in the sky dream is embraced by political forces. This was a great watch! Humor, Politics, Romance, Action all rolled up in a nice burrito for the adult movie goer. The first 2/3rds of the film has a lot of easy to relate to humor, especially if you are politically savvy. The last 3rd a nice bitter sweet romance that comes around in a Some Kind of Wonderful (1987) style finish. These kind of movies seem to get lost in the noise these days, a shame too because this really is brilliant film making. If you want to give dick and ass humor a break and would like some nice smooth entertainment that appeals to your higher brain functions this would be a top shelf pick. I haven't been moved by drama like this since Never Let Me Go (2010) except I was smiling instead of sobbing at the end. Highly Recommended.

Cleanskin (2012)

Terrorists in the UK capture some high explosive and a rouge security unit is sent to find them. This was a pretty exciting movie, sort of a cross between From Paris with Love (2010) and Ronin (1998). Some of the protagonist's monologues about violence and its nature are insightful and excellent. This film also gets to brag about having the best head-shot FX I have ever seen in my life. I had a couple issues with some of the fight and shoot out choreography.. hard to believe the Sean Bean character would make the mistakes he did with the training he supposedly had. Over all an excellent viewing experience with a nice slimy twist at the end. Recommended.

Being Flynn (2012)

An estranged father is reunited with his son while he is on the way down. This is a drama about a young man trying to find his direction and an old man who has lost it. Not a bad movie, full of cliches' and touchy-feely wine and cheese characters with no real depth. I'm not really sure what the point was with this movie except maybe a shout to stop feeling sorry for yourself and get over it. I did find one thing interesting though there was a catch phrase that kept popping up but those who used it didn't follow it.. typical? Perhaps. I'm sure some of the professional critique crowd will gush over the 'social commentary' of this one, for me it was pretty dull.

Attack the Block (2011)

Aliens land in a south London Ghetto and raise hell! Okay the main characters in this are a gang of teen-age hooligans who I had trouble understanding a damn word they said (it was technically English I guess). I think this one may appeal to the UK version of Kick-Ass (2010) fans. The alien FX were cool, something new. The movie moves along at a good pace, has sufficient tension, and ends better than it could have. Its fairly mindless with a fair amount of not overly graphic violence for the most part (they do a few but I think doing it a lot may not have been in the budget). My thought is this will appeal more to younger viewers. I viewed it once, it was enough.

Midnight Son (2011)

Geez another Vampire movie? Yeah but these don't sparkle! Actually there are only a couple in the whole movie. Things set up sort of like a guy was born with it and as he approaches his middle 20's his need for blood starts to burn within him. Requiem for a Dream meets The Hunger. They go at it like an addiction with the lead suffering from all number of heroin style side effects. Nice and moody with a heavy dose of urban seasoning... think of this as Vampire Noir. Very nicely done squeezing fresh juice out of this old turnip. Recommended.

Dead Season (2012)

ZOMBIES! Another B zombie movie, but this is a good example instead of a train wreck. Most the movie takes place on an island resort (that our main characters had to travel to via boat) that is being run as a proto military compound. Despite shortcomings in acting and FX the story really shows serious thought into how people would manage the coming zombie apocalypse. Patrols, food gathering, prime directives.. and the inability to beat the stupid out of some people. If you are an avid fan of the genre I would say a viewing would be worth your time.

Cell Count (2012)

A mysterious illness threatens humanity but one scientist offers a cure. Basically unless this shows up on the late late late show and you are too drunk, stoned or lazy to find the remote I would stay away from this one. This is the type of movie that give B movies a bad name. Terrible cliched acting (the mad scientist sounds like a NAZI? why not a big scar and a monocle too), lame FX, and just when the movie is coming to an end they start making Matrix like references and the movie ends in the middle of some non sequitur that leaves you thinking the plug got pulled during production and they are trying to pay off the bill in the editing studio. Way too much toe cheese and not enough cracker. I actually misread the IMDb rating on this and thought it was a 8.3 (83 votes) instead of the 3.2 or 2.3 it really has. Bad dog no biscuit!

Battle of the Pacific (2012) AKA Oba: The Last Samurai (2011)

The battle for Saipan during WWII. The original title is more appropriate for this movie but hey at least the dubbing is good! Much like Clint Eastwood's Letters from Iwo Jima (2006), this is told largely from the Japanese perspective or at least not overly 'YAY AMERICA!'. This isn't a big Hollyweird production so FX are modest and sweeping panoramic shots are minimal. Think of this more a story of the Japanese version of Thermopylae with a small band of Japanese soldiers dodging 1000 times their number. Some great notions of Japanese honor and culture alongside some of the anti-American propaganda those who aren't students of the era may not know. If you are a fan of intelligent war movies this is tailor made for you. Not to say the mindless ones (Full Metal Jacket, Apocalypse Now) aren't fun and enjoyable watches. Obviously some of the accuracy is a matter of opinion but overall a solid docudrama. A worthy tribute to a forgotten hero. Recommended.

Walk All Over Me (2007)

Missing cash, the three stooges of bad guys, a dominatrix, and her shit magnet cousin all collide in the suburbs of Vancouver. How I missed this until now is beyond me. Granted I went into this expecting more Dancing at the Blue Iguana than Shoot the Hero, but what I got was an enjoyable watch with a sliver of weird. This is another Leelee Sobieski showcase movie so if you can't stand her stay away from this. Personally I liked it, very entertaining, and should appeal to those who enjoy underdog makes good style stories but with humor instead of tears. Like many movies of this type not everything lines up well but this one hides it better than most. I wish they would have spent more time playing in the dominatrix dungeon but alas no...lol. Enjoy!

The Woman in the Fifth (2011)

A disgraced professor moves to Paris to be closer to his daughter and instead finds himself on a road into the weird. Okay I am going to admit I don't have a full handle on this movie yet and will watch it a couple more times to try to understand just what the hell happened. It had no trouble holding my attention and every time I thought it had picked a direction it turned out to be misdirection. I'm half of a mind to think that the movie is about the guy going crazy but there are murders and an apparent kidnapping so..? You have all the makings for a steamy romance, murder mystery, crime action.. but after setting those up it doesn't go through any of those doors. Something to challenge the mind or cosmic muffin? Hell I don't know! If you are tired of watching the same old shit and want to jump off into something adultish and different this isn't a bad pick. Still wondering... Oo

The Hunger Games (2012)

In the future as a punishment for some past rebellion, each year communities must send 2 chosen by lot to compete in a last man standing, kill or be killed free for all. You know what they call Hunger Games in Paris? Battle Royal with cheese. Basically this is Twilight meets Battle Royal with way too much vanilla dressing. Its not a total waste of time as some scenes are memorable (hallucination hornets anyone?) but I found it not only overly predictable but stale and cliched. I thought the Rodney King tie in was way over the top doing little more than reinforcing a negative stereotype. On the up side the 'pre-story' is decent and I liked the juxtaposition of a Metropolis style high tech society with the Russian style village living surviving on squirrels and rough bread.

A Thousand Words (2012)

A literary agent gets a cosmic kick in the ass after a visit to a new age spiritual guru. Eddie Murphy and Dream Works go together like milk and oatmeal. Familiar, nourishing, great for kids, bland and boring. Think of this as Liar Liar (1997) with a cup of willow bark tea and a namaste instead of sugar and screaming. Nice family friendly viewing, easy to watch, even the outrageous stuff is time tested and non threatening. Still a good message and an overall positive experience. Something you can watch with the kids without being bored or horrified. Coming in at a viewer friendly 90 minutes there is no reason not to make this a rental.

Gone (2012)

A woman swears she was kidnapped and escaped but when police find no trace she is committed. Two years later she is convinced he has returned to get her. A fairly entertaining movie that uses a constant thread of unlikely and hard to swallow events to move things forward. The lead is the same gecko eyed player from the recent Red Riding hood reboot but not as annoying in this role. Things stay fairly brisk throughout so after the first 20 minutes it had no trouble keeping my interest. For fans of 'fuck you for not believing me even though there was nothing to corroborate my story' movies this one is tailor made for you.

Jeff, Who Lives at Home (2011)

A zen loser gets to play hero for a day. This is a cutesy sort of random style movie about a day in the life for a mother, her stoner son who lives in her basement, and his middle management brother. This is one of the better 'safe date' movies I've seen in awhile. Its humorous without zingers, love without syrup, being zen and at one with the cosmos while wandering around like a complete jackass, pretty much a movie where the players pretend they are real people. And to top it off they have a slow pitch bid in favor of older women 'experimenting' with lesbianism. (Susan Sarandon played mom so it wasn't a hard sell for her). So as a gal you don't have to worry about tentacles coming on because you're scared and guys you get to show how open minded and well balanced you are on this safe movie date. It is a feel good movie, done very well, and yes you will want to clap at the end. Oh just an FYI- if you are in a hotel room with someone and your spouse doesn't know about it and its not part of your job, regardless your state of dress when you get caught, YOU ARE CHEATING!

Twixt (2011)

A 'bargain basement Stephen King' author (Val Kilmer) winds up in a sleepy little town where nothing is as it seems. Bruce Dern plays the multi-talented sheriff/wood-smith/bat expert/would be author who seeks to co-write a novel utilizing an unusual corpse in the morgue as the center piece with the washed up town novelty. So at this point I was thinking cheesy Salem's Lot knock off when out of the blue everything takes a hard left turn and corkscrews deeper and deeper into weird, dark and not so scary. By the time everything is said and done the object of Val's demise is his salvation! Slick bit of enjoyable film making that has your head bobbing in agreement with the ending. If you are the type who isn't afraid to sop up chocolate syrup with a piece of toast you may find this a very tasty bit indeed! I didn't know this was a Coppola film until just now. Recommended.

Wanderlust (2012)

A NYC couple has the rug pulled out from under them and leads them on a journey into the weird. If you have been wondering what Jennifer Aniston has been up to lately well here ya go. This is a very enjoyable low-key comedy/feel good movie that mostly takes place in a dropped out of time commune in Georgia. A few moments aside (a prolonged starring into a mirror scene working up the nerve to have sex with a smoking hot goddess had me on the verge of turning it off.. another 10 seconds and this review wouldn't exist) its about 60 minutes of amused grinning with 10 minutes of set-up/wrap-up on either end. The peyote tea bit is definitely the high point of the watch, breaking from the low key understated humor of most the rest of the movie, and had me guffawing in appreciation. Some impressive male frontal nudity aside (and one rather disturbing scene of nudists running) the film is largely family friendly and a sure treat for some easy feel good vibes. Recommended.

Piranha 3DD (2012)

The prehistoric flesh eating fishes are back! Boobs, blood, bad acting and worse sight gags are whats on the menu with this 'ah gee its rated R' pre-teen boner fest. There is no shortage of naked and barely clothed women running around, a few new ways to gross people out, and a couple scenes that you will want to see again despite how painful it is. Definitely mindless fun! Make it a drinking night tag team with Club Dread (2004) and enjoy the goof fest!

Prometheus (2012)

Ancient writings send a group of scientists into deep space seeking the origins of man. Pitched as a 'prequel' to the Alien series this is the big summer bone being offered up to starving sci-fi movie goers. First off the FX are excellent, and the plot is strong (simple, but strong). This is a fairly straight up meat and potatoes film without many 'clever twists' despite its ending. There are enough obvious tie ins to the Alien franchise that they don't have to come out and point 'see! see!'(well okay at the end they do). I'm a little shocked at some of the reviews so far... I'm not sure how 'happy ending' ever made it into the discussion. I was okay with everything until about 40 minutes in where they decide not to carry sidearms into an unexplored foreign environment then just minutes later while in that unexplored environment its decided that breaking the seal on the space suits and taking off helmets is a good idea (really? you should feel like Guy from Galaxy Quest at this point). Things get fairly predictable from this point and everyone dies (oops sorry.. lol). While this is sub par for Ridley Scott notable sci-fi (Blade Runner, Alien) its really not such a bad film in the world of movies. Unfortunately I think a small angry group of vocal sci-fi purists will sink this via reviews and word of mouth. Myself I was disappointed but only in that I had such high expectations and was really looking forward to no filler sci-fi fare. So while I won't recommend you go see this in the theater, I wouldn't hold it against anyone who goes anyway. If you are a sci-fi fan you will see it eventually.

In Darkness (2011)

A based on true events story about a Polish plumber who hid a group of Jews in the sewers for over a year during WWII. This, like other movies of this type, is not an easy movie to watch. The film is well put together, not overly graphic, and emotionally challenging. While it doesn't have the scope of Schindler's List or the double fisted emotional pounding of The Grey Zone, nor the qualities of character of Return to the Hiding Place, it none the less is powerful film making and deserves to be seen. If the way some of the characters behaved is accurate its a wonder the Polish guy didn't shoot them himself. Recommended.

Jane Eyre (2011)

Apparently this story has been around awhile and had been remade more than a few times. If you are unfamiliar this is a drama/romance about an orphan girl become woman in I would guess early 1800's England. This was some great drama with a nice teaser in it. Aside from the stunning cinematography all the players are in A list form.. not only was my attention riveted to the screen for the duration, I could actually project myself into the scenes (fly on the wall of course). Nothing came across over melodramatic that wasn't supposed to. Great story. Traditional lessons to be learned, with the Jane character brushing sainthood. Yeah its a chick flick but its more proper romance than sappy gooey lets drink this poison and die together rot. Highly Recommended.

Contraband (2012)

When the brother in law winds up in the soup with the mob Mark Wahlberg's character has to jump back into the family 'business' to make things right. Pretty standard Wahlberg action flick.. this one centers around moving contraband on a large freighter. Tough guy gone straight has to bail his nutsack brother in law out of a fix while getting boned in the ass from his equally nutsacked best friend. So long story short nothing goes as planned (shocking I know!), Mark has to get his tough guy on, dodging bullets while playing nursemaid to a guy with the IQ of an eggplant. So its not a bad watch, just no surprises, nothing even remotely fresh, with the Kodak finish. If you are a fan of the genre there is nothing to make this one any better or worse than most of its kind.

Exit Humanity (2011)

19th century American zombies! This is a B-grade movie with outstanding presentation. They preface the story with a graphic saying zombies are popping up and a journal from the 19th century has surfaced which may give clues how to survive.. no current date is given and the whole of the movie is as told from the journal. Zombie FX are very good considering (they sort of look like ghouls) and the story comes together in a nice neat package. The movie is broken up into chapters and there is some animation (very cool pen sketch style) sparsely scattered throughout. Nice twist on the origin (zombie zero), with a human protagonist element as well. Its not going to win any awards but it was an enjoyable new flavor on a venerable subject.

Snow White and the Huntsman (2012)

Another retelling of the German fable made famous by Disney. This reminded me of Snow White: A Tale of Terror (1997) but with more frosting. Charlize Theron nails the evil queen but its really no surprise having her turn in masterful renderings. The FX are really good, the whole dark forest/fairy valley trek is visually very pleasing.. movie and fable fans will recognize a lot of blending from other sources to round out this version. (the fairies don't really look like the miner creatures from Galaxy Quest do they?). The story itself is fairly strong with the supporting cast turning in respectable work. On the downside I couldn't wrap my head around Kristen Stewart as Snow White (the fairest of them all? really?), I find her to be one of the worst dramatic players making the rounds coming in slightly worse than Margot Kidder with her Mr. Ed lip. All and all an enjoyable viewing experience, it wasn't great for me, but I didn't really feel cheated until buck 20 Snow White straps on full plate and gallops off to battle like she was born to it.. Oo.. This one won't be making it to my collection. Make this a matinee or rental.

The Pact (2012)

The death of her mother brings an estranged daughter back to the house that holds so many haunting memories. Not a bad little thriller here, has some cool goose pimply moments set up with atmosphere instead of something jumping at the screen. The director makes good use of 'whats expected' by not doing it and presents a nice mix of the super natural with the creepy with the 'well what were you expecting?'. A couple of the usual gaffs and one that stands out (click, click, bang!) and finishes with a Ross moment but nothing that really diminishes the experience.. if you are looking for something to get your pulse racing without making you pee your pants this wouldn't be a bad selection.

Thin Ice (2011)

A worn rug of an insurance salesman sees an opportunity to make a fast buck. Very slick, I enjoyed it. (You will realize why I can't say anything without a spoiler after you see it- go into it cold for maximum impact). Recommended.

Safe House (2012)

A CIA housekeeper wishing for some action gets more than he can handle when a high profile rouge agent is brought to his post. This formula action style movie isn't anything new, just about everything you think you know about the story line from the previews isn't, which is typical as well. Now just because its nothing new doesn't mean its not worth seeing.. sort of like a Club Sandwich.. you have had them a hundred times but they are still tasty. Of course you know that if Denzel Washington has his name on it its going to be a tasty club indeed! This was a fairly smart bit of film making and it had no trouble holding my attention throughout. A nice addition to Ryan's portfolio as well and he rises to the occasion well. Hard to miss with this if you are a fan of the genre or either of the headline players. Tasty Club with a 7&7. Recommended.

The Philly Kid (2012)

A local wrestling hero breaks up a robbery and spends 10 years in prison for killing a guy. This sets up as a fairly generic hard luck/true heart story. Our hero has to survive crooked cops, other peoples debts, gangsters, a trainer who tries to hamstring him.. about the only one not bird dogging him is the paper boy screaming "Two Dollars!". We have all seen this movie a dozen times before, think a reboot of Lionheart (1990) although I am sure there are more recent examples (funny IMDb gives Lionheart a 1.3 better rating when the two are basically the same movie.. go figure). Anyway there is some cool MMA style cage fights that don't come with a Rocky theme song so thats refreshing. Easy watching you may want to catch when cable is showing it 4 times a day.

This Means War (2012)

A competition for a woman's favors drives a wedge between a couple high octane spies. Your typical action/comedy/romance (slasher/horror/sci-fi..yada yada). Sets up good everything is relatively entertaining for about 30 minutes... then they throw a wrench into the mix and it becomes weirdish... for example, they are supposed to be best buddies, one is a playboy the other guy not so much... so when the not so much guy falls for her, the playboy (who was ready to put a bullet in her head) turns around on a single kiss she lays on him for the sake of her ex-boyfriend right after chiding HIM for having the emotional maturity of a 5 year old.... HUH?! Then the 2 guys become super competitive, and start doing spy things to stalk the girl.. cool to have friends like that. (psssttttt.. Reese you aren't that hot).. anyway the movie does manage to stay pretty funny in places but steadily evolves into a chick-ish flick including the obligatory shot in the nuts. Sleepless in Seattle with gun play. Still better than anything with Mr. Comedy Body in it.

The Avengers (2012)

WOW! Just WOW! For those living under a rock The Avengers is a Marvel Studios equivalent to MGM's Cleopatra.. no expense was spared to bring a group of characters together 4 of which already have their own movies. So was it a gamble? Sure. Was getting Joss Whedon to direct it a brilliant move? You bet it was. This movie is going to crush the box office and may set new records. For the first hour and 30 minutes its a pretty good movie.. a lot of set up and a very cool look into the mind and methods of the Black Widow that will undoubtedly bring a measure of appreciation into the character that was lacking up to this point. Thor gets toughened up considerably from what he was in his namesake feature. Big surprise with the presentation of Hawkeye, smartly done. So you are 90 minutes in, the movie has been good up till now but you are wondering where all the excitement about this movie is coming from, its good but its not THAT good. Surprise! The last 30 minutes of this movie may be the best 30 minutes in comic movie history. Holy Shit! When they uncork the Hulk the movie slides up to a whole new level.. undoubtedly the star of the movie he becomes the source of humor, ass kicking like you have never seen before- the scene with the Hulk and Loki I have on a loop so I can laugh at it over and over.. Hulk slaps the living piss out of EVERYTHING! But don't take my word for it true believers, peel your ass out of that chair and go see this movie right now! HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!

Lockout (2012)

Super agent is sent to orbiting space station to rescue the presidents daughter. Yeah I know >yawn<, but wait! what this really turns out to be is Escape from New York (1981) with new paint and rims. Lets do the bad first.. leave any notion of real world behind, this guy is super Gumby.. he takes a beating that would kill anyone else and shrugs it off. Not that its never been seen in a movie before but not since Arnold stepped on a grenade in Commando that didn't even rip his pants has it been so in your face. Now on the the good.. delicious array of delightfully twisted and cliched bad guys, witty(ish) banter from the hero, lots of boom boom, and.. oh yeah everything happens in space so you get cool space FX as well. Great movie? no.. Fun watch? oh yeah. Just remember to strap on your macho.. it would be fun if people started showing up wearing a Snake Plissken eye patch..

Haywire (2011)

A set-up goes south. This is kind of a Mission Impossible meets Jason Bourne mash up. One thing I've never understood with this kind of story is why the company would try to make one of their best field agents into the goat? I mean don't they watch movies? Didn't they read the Evil Overlord handbook? It ALWAYS turns to shit on them and its no different this time. This is actually a very smart bit of film making.. it moves briskly so you get more action than suspense and casting Gina Carano, who has actual fighting experience (besides being just smoking hot), in the lead only lends to the films credibility. I always feel a tweak when watching some 85 pound super model or ballerina kick the hell out of a room full of 200 lb killers (I'm not saying it isn't fun to watch, but the suspension of realism gets stretched pretty thin).. well you don't get that here. Aside from excellent choreography, Gina has the build of a fighter and the fact she actually knows what she's doing is clear to see. She has an impressive array of veteran players in support that really leads me to believe her agent is the devil herself to land Gina in this role as her first big screen showing. Hard to go wrong with this one. Highly Recommended.

Justice League: Doom (Video 2012)

The League finds themselves going against its most dangerous opponent ever.. It will be hard to describe much of the story line without a bunch of spoilers (its not presented as a mystery), sufficed to say its a fairly standard DC presentation. Animation is adequate, also standard for these type of releases. What makes this particular offering shine is the character insight into the core of the Justice League. The weaknesses of The Flash, Hal Jordan, J'onn, Wonder Woman, Bruce Wayne and Superman are all exploited by the League of Doom (here is a twist that would be a spoiler) before the remarkable character of Batman takes center stage. For fans of the genre, and Batman fans, I would say this is a must view event. Recommended.

Battleship (2012)

A group of sailors find themselves fighting for the survival of the planet. Transformers meets Battle Los Angeles (2011) in this FX driven action feature. Visually this is a top shelf offering, fast paced with lots of action and more than a little humor. On the flip side its lacks the 'meatiness' of either Transformers or Battle Los Angeles in both scope and story. But if you went to this movie for story depth and character development you are either high, wound up in the wrong theater, or both. However there is no shortage of 'BOO-YA!' moments, with the geezers vs ET finale being especially satisfying. Very cool twist on weaponizing the Langoliers. Take it for what it is- 130 minutes of ass kicking FX. I will say that having no expectations going into this definitely worked in my favor.