Suck (2009)

A struggling band discover a key to fame that has nothing to do with music. Not what I expected given the title. Actually this is a pretty funny watch; imagine fronting a band of vampires while your roadie stuffs garbage bags with groupies.. Dark slapstick served deadpan with a side of Alice Cooper. Well played and fun to watch. A comedy that leaves pretentious at the door, now how refreshing is that? Enjoy your Slushee.

Inglourious Basterds (2009)

A group of Jewish American soldiers covertly enter German occupied France to create terror and mayhem. This is a Tarantino film and I must say I was a bit disappointed. Its not terrible in and of itself (although Brad Pitt's character started to grate my nerves), just not what I've come to expect from a Tarantino film. This is one of those 'near-history' stories that sprinkle historical events into an otherwise completely fictitious tale. On the plus side there are a number of memorable scenes and one hell of a great ending. Schnitzel mit sour kraut.

Salt (2010)

A international super spy is revealed as a soviet mole. Mission Impossible meets The Bourne Identity in this action packed espionage thriller. Great job from all the players with a straight forward story without a ridiculously twisty plot trying to keep you guessing. Action is intense for the most part without becoming too unbelievable. As a bonus they actually have to load their weapons! The whole "billion pissed off muslems" thing was pretty silly (you mean they aren't pissed off now?), and one of the few parts of the movie that had me rolling my eyes (I did approve of the targeting though). Not exactly fresh fare, but well prepared. Load up your plate and enjoy!

The Killing Jar (2010)

A stranger walks into a diner with a shotgun and hilarity ensues. 90 minutes of tedious dialogue and gushing blood. I wish movie makers who are going to focus movies on gun use would actually go to a range and at least see how they operate. 1911's slide locks to the rear when the last round is fired, just FYI.

The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009)

An insane German neurosurgeon who specializes in the separation of conjoined twins decides to create one. This is one twisted nut of a feature. Fairly B movie across the board. There doesn't really seem to be any purpose to this movie other than to gross people out, and at that it does a fair job. See it if you must, but you have been warned.

Centurion (2010)

An elite legion of Roman soldiers in Britannia is massacred, leaving a handful of survivors to fight their way back to Roman held territory while being pursued by Picts sworn to kill them. A fairly straight forward story, nothing too complex, just enough character development to make it more difficult than it should be to pick a side even though movie dogma already has dictated the winner. Very well played all around with an engaging plot. Just the right mix of action and tension, with a high degree of realism, especially the battles. If you enjoyed King Arthur (2004) chances are good you will enjoy this one as well. Recommended.

Black Death (2010)

The black plague sweeps Europe. The rumor of a village inhabited by a necromancer sends an envoy from the bishop to discover the truth. On par with Flesh+Blood (1985) but a bit less crass, this is a very enjoyable viewing experience with an interesting question of morality. Well done on all sides. Be aware the gore factor is on the high side with scenes of combat and torture. Fans of the era should find this an enjoyable look at the near historical. Recommended.

Naked Weapon (2002)

Young girls all over the world are kidnapped and taken to a secret island fortress to become deadly trained assassins. This is a solid cheese fest with explosions, gunfights and very hot women thrown into the mix. For fans of the Jamie Lee Curtis scene in True Lies (1994), there is a spicier double dose in this flick. Not exactly top shelf viewing, it still had enough cool things going on to make a viewer (especially male) much more forgiving. I recommend beer instead of popcorn.

The Brave One (2007)

After an attack that claims the life of her fiance and leaves her in a coma, one woman decides she isn't going to be a victim anymore. This is an updated version of Death Wish (1974) with Jodie Foster instead of Charles Bronson as the lead. Not being a huge Foster fan, I was pleasantly surprised she didn't overact this role into the ground. A solid viewing experience with just a bit of suspended belief to set this ship afloat, it should appeal to boys and girls alike. For the record, an unregistered Kahr 9mm for a thousand bucks in NYC is a deal and a half. Hard to go wrong with this selection.

Dough Boys (2009)

Life for 3 young players and a buddy gets too real after they try to unload a score on the gangster they unknowingly boosted it from. Softsoap look at ghetto life and what it takes to get one young man to pursue a life instead of a 'rep'. Fairly well played up until the big gun battle that seems to suffer a bit. Not a bad watch, but fans of the genre may find it a bit thin compared to others with the same pitch (ie: Baby Boy (2001)).

Tekken (2010)

The murder of his mother drives a young smuggler to step forward and challenge the world order dominance of Tekken in arena style combat. Very loosely based on the game of the same name, this is a turkey sandwich with mayo on white bread style fight movie. Nothing new or really exciting, its still well presented and enjoyable for what it is. At the very least there's enough tasty eye candy to keep you from being bored.

She's Out of My League (2010)

When a top shelf honey shows romantic interest in a no-go-Joe, it sets the stage for disaster. We've seen this formula before but this time it actually works. Lots of chuckles and a few good hearty laughs with nothing too graphic or far outside the paint. Nice easy humor and easy to believe set-ups (for the most part) drive a very enjoyable and relaxing viewing experience. Recommended.

Unthinkable (2010)

A man claims to have hidden 3 atomic bombs around the country and a specialist is brought in to extract the information. Kind of along the lines of Gone Baby Gone (2007) in that the movie creates a moral dilemma. This movie depicts pretty aggressive methods of torture, although not too graphically, so be warned. I thought this was a good look at what the western world faces today. The very values we hold dear are being exploited to destroy our way of life, so do we go down with the ship or suspend those values? Twice before this choice has been made. Either way you come down, there are no easy answers, especially when encountering the extremes. Recommended.

Hot Tub Time Machine (2010)

A trio of middle age friends decide to revisit a prime party spot from their youth and wake up in the 1980's. Pretty standard John Cusack comedy fare with slapstick and near serious moments side by side. Surprisingly one of the few drags was the appearance of Chevy Chase. Easy to watch with easy laughs, aimed more towards the guy. Would go well with delivery pizza and a couple beer swilling buddies.

Green Zone (2010)

The search for WMD's in Iraq uncover an insidious conspiracy. What starts out as a promising if somewhat naive' war movie quickly devolves into another sycophantic leftist rant about the evils of the US 'regime' with only the towering intellect and moral fiber of Matt Damon to save us. If you are one of those who has a bumper sticker slogan mentality of Iraq, this flick was made for you and will serve to reinforce everything your kook-aid swilling drone programing has told you. The caricature encapsulates the mood of the flick well, along with the overgrown size of Damon's forehead. In honor of such noxious swill, I have decided to award this flick the booby prize.

Furry Vengeance (2010)

When the developers come into the forest, the woodland critters unite behind a clever raccoon to expel them. Brendan Fraser and Brooke Shields star in this wacky flick aimed at younger viewers. Sight gags and critter CGI drive the yucks with the boyscout charm of Brendan Fraser providing close support. Preschool cuddly and should entertain a younger demographic while thankfully lacking any singing dwarfs in foam rubber suits. Raccoons are so cute..:P

Brooklyn's Finest (2009)

Three different cops leading three very separate lives find their paths converging to one night that will forever define all of them. This is the best serious cop movie I've seen since The Departed (2006) . Action, subterfuge and resignation are the themes on display in this well played drama. Recommended for those seeking a more adult viewing event.

The Tournament (2009)

Every so many years the worlds best assassins are gathered for a last man standing free for all of death. Nothing new here, but the cookie cutter storyline is well performed. Lots of action, boom boom, and grisly deaths. Choreography is well done and the near finale' demolition run with a double decker bus and a gas truck is a must see. An enjoyable if somewhat mindless mayhem movie. Sort of a rehash of The Condemned (2007) .

After.Life (2009)

A young woman finds herself in a funeral home being prepared for burial by a man who claims he can speak to the dead. Odd duck time. This is a pretty weird movie that has a couple great big holes in it, and leaves a lot of questions unanswered, though I think the last is on purpose. I can't shake the notion that this movie is about a very clever serial killer, and there are enough clues dropped to help this conclusion. Anyway you slice it, its not a bad watch, just kind of weird.. compare to The Skeleton Key (2005) without the neat and tidy wrap-up.

Operation Endgame (2010)

A secret covert ops organization turns on each other while locked in a secret facility with the timer running before it turns into a fireball. What starts out as a promising comedy quickly devolves into a sycophantic leftist rant about the evils of GW and the coming of the savior Obooboo (I bet this producer wished they had waited a few months.. lol). If you can get past the moonbat idiocy, the film isn't a bad watch, even with it becoming formulaic and stinted as it goes along. Get Smart meets Scream. One watch was enough for me however.