The Woman in the Fifth (2011)

A disgraced professor moves to Paris to be closer to his daughter and instead finds himself on a road into the weird. Okay I am going to admit I don't have a full handle on this movie yet and will watch it a couple more times to try to understand just what the hell happened. It had no trouble holding my attention and every time I thought it had picked a direction it turned out to be misdirection. I'm half of a mind to think that the movie is about the guy going crazy but there are murders and an apparent kidnapping so..? You have all the makings for a steamy romance, murder mystery, crime action.. but after setting those up it doesn't go through any of those doors. Something to challenge the mind or cosmic muffin? Hell I don't know! If you are tired of watching the same old shit and want to jump off into something adultish and different this isn't a bad pick. Still wondering... Oo

The Hunger Games (2012)

In the future as a punishment for some past rebellion, each year communities must send 2 chosen by lot to compete in a last man standing, kill or be killed free for all. You know what they call Hunger Games in Paris? Battle Royal with cheese. Basically this is Twilight meets Battle Royal with way too much vanilla dressing. Its not a total waste of time as some scenes are memorable (hallucination hornets anyone?) but I found it not only overly predictable but stale and cliched. I thought the Rodney King tie in was way over the top doing little more than reinforcing a negative stereotype. On the up side the 'pre-story' is decent and I liked the juxtaposition of a Metropolis style high tech society with the Russian style village living surviving on squirrels and rough bread.

A Thousand Words (2012)

A literary agent gets a cosmic kick in the ass after a visit to a new age spiritual guru. Eddie Murphy and Dream Works go together like milk and oatmeal. Familiar, nourishing, great for kids, bland and boring. Think of this as Liar Liar (1997) with a cup of willow bark tea and a namaste instead of sugar and screaming. Nice family friendly viewing, easy to watch, even the outrageous stuff is time tested and non threatening. Still a good message and an overall positive experience. Something you can watch with the kids without being bored or horrified. Coming in at a viewer friendly 90 minutes there is no reason not to make this a rental.

Gone (2012)

A woman swears she was kidnapped and escaped but when police find no trace she is committed. Two years later she is convinced he has returned to get her. A fairly entertaining movie that uses a constant thread of unlikely and hard to swallow events to move things forward. The lead is the same gecko eyed player from the recent Red Riding hood reboot but not as annoying in this role. Things stay fairly brisk throughout so after the first 20 minutes it had no trouble keeping my interest. For fans of 'fuck you for not believing me even though there was nothing to corroborate my story' movies this one is tailor made for you.

Jeff, Who Lives at Home (2011)

A zen loser gets to play hero for a day. This is a cutesy sort of random style movie about a day in the life for a mother, her stoner son who lives in her basement, and his middle management brother. This is one of the better 'safe date' movies I've seen in awhile. Its humorous without zingers, love without syrup, being zen and at one with the cosmos while wandering around like a complete jackass, pretty much a movie where the players pretend they are real people. And to top it off they have a slow pitch bid in favor of older women 'experimenting' with lesbianism. (Susan Sarandon played mom so it wasn't a hard sell for her). So as a gal you don't have to worry about tentacles coming on because you're scared and guys you get to show how open minded and well balanced you are on this safe movie date. It is a feel good movie, done very well, and yes you will want to clap at the end. Oh just an FYI- if you are in a hotel room with someone and your spouse doesn't know about it and its not part of your job, regardless your state of dress when you get caught, YOU ARE CHEATING!

Twixt (2011)

A 'bargain basement Stephen King' author (Val Kilmer) winds up in a sleepy little town where nothing is as it seems. Bruce Dern plays the multi-talented sheriff/wood-smith/bat expert/would be author who seeks to co-write a novel utilizing an unusual corpse in the morgue as the center piece with the washed up town novelty. So at this point I was thinking cheesy Salem's Lot knock off when out of the blue everything takes a hard left turn and corkscrews deeper and deeper into weird, dark and not so scary. By the time everything is said and done the object of Val's demise is his salvation! Slick bit of enjoyable film making that has your head bobbing in agreement with the ending. If you are the type who isn't afraid to sop up chocolate syrup with a piece of toast you may find this a very tasty bit indeed! I didn't know this was a Coppola film until just now. Recommended.

Wanderlust (2012)

A NYC couple has the rug pulled out from under them and leads them on a journey into the weird. If you have been wondering what Jennifer Aniston has been up to lately well here ya go. This is a very enjoyable low-key comedy/feel good movie that mostly takes place in a dropped out of time commune in Georgia. A few moments aside (a prolonged starring into a mirror scene working up the nerve to have sex with a smoking hot goddess had me on the verge of turning it off.. another 10 seconds and this review wouldn't exist) its about 60 minutes of amused grinning with 10 minutes of set-up/wrap-up on either end. The peyote tea bit is definitely the high point of the watch, breaking from the low key understated humor of most the rest of the movie, and had me guffawing in appreciation. Some impressive male frontal nudity aside (and one rather disturbing scene of nudists running) the film is largely family friendly and a sure treat for some easy feel good vibes. Recommended.

Piranha 3DD (2012)

The prehistoric flesh eating fishes are back! Boobs, blood, bad acting and worse sight gags are whats on the menu with this 'ah gee its rated R' pre-teen boner fest. There is no shortage of naked and barely clothed women running around, a few new ways to gross people out, and a couple scenes that you will want to see again despite how painful it is. Definitely mindless fun! Make it a drinking night tag team with Club Dread (2004) and enjoy the goof fest!

Prometheus (2012)

Ancient writings send a group of scientists into deep space seeking the origins of man. Pitched as a 'prequel' to the Alien series this is the big summer bone being offered up to starving sci-fi movie goers. First off the FX are excellent, and the plot is strong (simple, but strong). This is a fairly straight up meat and potatoes film without many 'clever twists' despite its ending. There are enough obvious tie ins to the Alien franchise that they don't have to come out and point 'see! see!'(well okay at the end they do). I'm a little shocked at some of the reviews so far... I'm not sure how 'happy ending' ever made it into the discussion. I was okay with everything until about 40 minutes in where they decide not to carry sidearms into an unexplored foreign environment then just minutes later while in that unexplored environment its decided that breaking the seal on the space suits and taking off helmets is a good idea (really? you should feel like Guy from Galaxy Quest at this point). Things get fairly predictable from this point and everyone dies (oops sorry.. lol). While this is sub par for Ridley Scott notable sci-fi (Blade Runner, Alien) its really not such a bad film in the world of movies. Unfortunately I think a small angry group of vocal sci-fi purists will sink this via reviews and word of mouth. Myself I was disappointed but only in that I had such high expectations and was really looking forward to no filler sci-fi fare. So while I won't recommend you go see this in the theater, I wouldn't hold it against anyone who goes anyway. If you are a sci-fi fan you will see it eventually.

In Darkness (2011)

A based on true events story about a Polish plumber who hid a group of Jews in the sewers for over a year during WWII. This, like other movies of this type, is not an easy movie to watch. The film is well put together, not overly graphic, and emotionally challenging. While it doesn't have the scope of Schindler's List or the double fisted emotional pounding of The Grey Zone, nor the qualities of character of Return to the Hiding Place, it none the less is powerful film making and deserves to be seen. If the way some of the characters behaved is accurate its a wonder the Polish guy didn't shoot them himself. Recommended.

Jane Eyre (2011)

Apparently this story has been around awhile and had been remade more than a few times. If you are unfamiliar this is a drama/romance about an orphan girl become woman in I would guess early 1800's England. This was some great drama with a nice teaser in it. Aside from the stunning cinematography all the players are in A list form.. not only was my attention riveted to the screen for the duration, I could actually project myself into the scenes (fly on the wall of course). Nothing came across over melodramatic that wasn't supposed to. Great story. Traditional lessons to be learned, with the Jane character brushing sainthood. Yeah its a chick flick but its more proper romance than sappy gooey lets drink this poison and die together rot. Highly Recommended.

Contraband (2012)

When the brother in law winds up in the soup with the mob Mark Wahlberg's character has to jump back into the family 'business' to make things right. Pretty standard Wahlberg action flick.. this one centers around moving contraband on a large freighter. Tough guy gone straight has to bail his nutsack brother in law out of a fix while getting boned in the ass from his equally nutsacked best friend. So long story short nothing goes as planned (shocking I know!), Mark has to get his tough guy on, dodging bullets while playing nursemaid to a guy with the IQ of an eggplant. So its not a bad watch, just no surprises, nothing even remotely fresh, with the Kodak finish. If you are a fan of the genre there is nothing to make this one any better or worse than most of its kind.

Exit Humanity (2011)

19th century American zombies! This is a B-grade movie with outstanding presentation. They preface the story with a graphic saying zombies are popping up and a journal from the 19th century has surfaced which may give clues how to survive.. no current date is given and the whole of the movie is as told from the journal. Zombie FX are very good considering (they sort of look like ghouls) and the story comes together in a nice neat package. The movie is broken up into chapters and there is some animation (very cool pen sketch style) sparsely scattered throughout. Nice twist on the origin (zombie zero), with a human protagonist element as well. Its not going to win any awards but it was an enjoyable new flavor on a venerable subject.

Snow White and the Huntsman (2012)

Another retelling of the German fable made famous by Disney. This reminded me of Snow White: A Tale of Terror (1997) but with more frosting. Charlize Theron nails the evil queen but its really no surprise having her turn in masterful renderings. The FX are really good, the whole dark forest/fairy valley trek is visually very pleasing.. movie and fable fans will recognize a lot of blending from other sources to round out this version. (the fairies don't really look like the miner creatures from Galaxy Quest do they?). The story itself is fairly strong with the supporting cast turning in respectable work. On the downside I couldn't wrap my head around Kristen Stewart as Snow White (the fairest of them all? really?), I find her to be one of the worst dramatic players making the rounds coming in slightly worse than Margot Kidder with her Mr. Ed lip. All and all an enjoyable viewing experience, it wasn't great for me, but I didn't really feel cheated until buck 20 Snow White straps on full plate and gallops off to battle like she was born to it.. Oo.. This one won't be making it to my collection. Make this a matinee or rental.

The Pact (2012)

The death of her mother brings an estranged daughter back to the house that holds so many haunting memories. Not a bad little thriller here, has some cool goose pimply moments set up with atmosphere instead of something jumping at the screen. The director makes good use of 'whats expected' by not doing it and presents a nice mix of the super natural with the creepy with the 'well what were you expecting?'. A couple of the usual gaffs and one that stands out (click, click, bang!) and finishes with a Ross moment but nothing that really diminishes the experience.. if you are looking for something to get your pulse racing without making you pee your pants this wouldn't be a bad selection.

Thin Ice (2011)

A worn rug of an insurance salesman sees an opportunity to make a fast buck. Very slick, I enjoyed it. (You will realize why I can't say anything without a spoiler after you see it- go into it cold for maximum impact). Recommended.

Safe House (2012)

A CIA housekeeper wishing for some action gets more than he can handle when a high profile rouge agent is brought to his post. This formula action style movie isn't anything new, just about everything you think you know about the story line from the previews isn't, which is typical as well. Now just because its nothing new doesn't mean its not worth seeing.. sort of like a Club Sandwich.. you have had them a hundred times but they are still tasty. Of course you know that if Denzel Washington has his name on it its going to be a tasty club indeed! This was a fairly smart bit of film making and it had no trouble holding my attention throughout. A nice addition to Ryan's portfolio as well and he rises to the occasion well. Hard to miss with this if you are a fan of the genre or either of the headline players. Tasty Club with a 7&7. Recommended.

The Philly Kid (2012)

A local wrestling hero breaks up a robbery and spends 10 years in prison for killing a guy. This sets up as a fairly generic hard luck/true heart story. Our hero has to survive crooked cops, other peoples debts, gangsters, a trainer who tries to hamstring him.. about the only one not bird dogging him is the paper boy screaming "Two Dollars!". We have all seen this movie a dozen times before, think a reboot of Lionheart (1990) although I am sure there are more recent examples (funny IMDb gives Lionheart a 1.3 better rating when the two are basically the same movie.. go figure). Anyway there is some cool MMA style cage fights that don't come with a Rocky theme song so thats refreshing. Easy watching you may want to catch when cable is showing it 4 times a day.

This Means War (2012)

A competition for a woman's favors drives a wedge between a couple high octane spies. Your typical action/comedy/romance (slasher/horror/sci-fi..yada yada). Sets up good everything is relatively entertaining for about 30 minutes... then they throw a wrench into the mix and it becomes weirdish... for example, they are supposed to be best buddies, one is a playboy the other guy not so much... so when the not so much guy falls for her, the playboy (who was ready to put a bullet in her head) turns around on a single kiss she lays on him for the sake of her ex-boyfriend right after chiding HIM for having the emotional maturity of a 5 year old.... HUH?! Then the 2 guys become super competitive, and start doing spy things to stalk the girl.. cool to have friends like that. (psssttttt.. Reese you aren't that hot).. anyway the movie does manage to stay pretty funny in places but steadily evolves into a chick-ish flick including the obligatory shot in the nuts. Sleepless in Seattle with gun play. Still better than anything with Mr. Comedy Body in it.

The Avengers (2012)

WOW! Just WOW! For those living under a rock The Avengers is a Marvel Studios equivalent to MGM's Cleopatra.. no expense was spared to bring a group of characters together 4 of which already have their own movies. So was it a gamble? Sure. Was getting Joss Whedon to direct it a brilliant move? You bet it was. This movie is going to crush the box office and may set new records. For the first hour and 30 minutes its a pretty good movie.. a lot of set up and a very cool look into the mind and methods of the Black Widow that will undoubtedly bring a measure of appreciation into the character that was lacking up to this point. Thor gets toughened up considerably from what he was in his namesake feature. Big surprise with the presentation of Hawkeye, smartly done. So you are 90 minutes in, the movie has been good up till now but you are wondering where all the excitement about this movie is coming from, its good but its not THAT good. Surprise! The last 30 minutes of this movie may be the best 30 minutes in comic movie history. Holy Shit! When they uncork the Hulk the movie slides up to a whole new level.. undoubtedly the star of the movie he becomes the source of humor, ass kicking like you have never seen before- the scene with the Hulk and Loki I have on a loop so I can laugh at it over and over.. Hulk slaps the living piss out of EVERYTHING! But don't take my word for it true believers, peel your ass out of that chair and go see this movie right now! HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!

Lockout (2012)

Super agent is sent to orbiting space station to rescue the presidents daughter. Yeah I know >yawn<, but wait! what this really turns out to be is Escape from New York (1981) with new paint and rims. Lets do the bad first.. leave any notion of real world behind, this guy is super Gumby.. he takes a beating that would kill anyone else and shrugs it off. Not that its never been seen in a movie before but not since Arnold stepped on a grenade in Commando that didn't even rip his pants has it been so in your face. Now on the the good.. delicious array of delightfully twisted and cliched bad guys, witty(ish) banter from the hero, lots of boom boom, and.. oh yeah everything happens in space so you get cool space FX as well. Great movie? no.. Fun watch? oh yeah. Just remember to strap on your macho.. it would be fun if people started showing up wearing a Snake Plissken eye patch..

Haywire (2011)

A set-up goes south. This is kind of a Mission Impossible meets Jason Bourne mash up. One thing I've never understood with this kind of story is why the company would try to make one of their best field agents into the goat? I mean don't they watch movies? Didn't they read the Evil Overlord handbook? It ALWAYS turns to shit on them and its no different this time. This is actually a very smart bit of film making.. it moves briskly so you get more action than suspense and casting Gina Carano, who has actual fighting experience (besides being just smoking hot), in the lead only lends to the films credibility. I always feel a tweak when watching some 85 pound super model or ballerina kick the hell out of a room full of 200 lb killers (I'm not saying it isn't fun to watch, but the suspension of realism gets stretched pretty thin).. well you don't get that here. Aside from excellent choreography, Gina has the build of a fighter and the fact she actually knows what she's doing is clear to see. She has an impressive array of veteran players in support that really leads me to believe her agent is the devil herself to land Gina in this role as her first big screen showing. Hard to go wrong with this one. Highly Recommended.

Justice League: Doom (Video 2012)

The League finds themselves going against its most dangerous opponent ever.. It will be hard to describe much of the story line without a bunch of spoilers (its not presented as a mystery), sufficed to say its a fairly standard DC presentation. Animation is adequate, also standard for these type of releases. What makes this particular offering shine is the character insight into the core of the Justice League. The weaknesses of The Flash, Hal Jordan, J'onn, Wonder Woman, Bruce Wayne and Superman are all exploited by the League of Doom (here is a twist that would be a spoiler) before the remarkable character of Batman takes center stage. For fans of the genre, and Batman fans, I would say this is a must view event. Recommended.

Battleship (2012)

A group of sailors find themselves fighting for the survival of the planet. Transformers meets Battle Los Angeles (2011) in this FX driven action feature. Visually this is a top shelf offering, fast paced with lots of action and more than a little humor. On the flip side its lacks the 'meatiness' of either Transformers or Battle Los Angeles in both scope and story. But if you went to this movie for story depth and character development you are either high, wound up in the wrong theater, or both. However there is no shortage of 'BOO-YA!' moments, with the geezers vs ET finale being especially satisfying. Very cool twist on weaponizing the Langoliers. Take it for what it is- 130 minutes of ass kicking FX. I will say that having no expectations going into this definitely worked in my favor.

The Awakening (2011)

A woman of science, known for debunking claims of the supernatural, is called upon to solve a mysterious death. A pretty fair thriller that makes use of atmosphere and intrigue to raise the hair on the back of your neck. Compare to The Orphanage (2007) in intensity and story development. You are required to suspend asking a fairly obvious question for the finish, but its a small price to pay for an otherwise very smart bit of film making. A nice medium intensity thriller that lets your brain carry some of the load.

The Darkest Hour (2011)

Strange invisible Aliens invade Earth. The idea for this is pretty cool, unfortunately it doesn't translate to the screen quite as well. This is what Red Dawn could have looked like if it was Aliens instead of Soviets. Basically a few Americans are in Moscow when the invasion happens and they are trying to find a way out of Russia and back to any western democracy. So they run around, fight some aliens, meet up with others fighting the aliens, figure out that the Aliens aren't as tough as everyone thought they were (even though apparently they were able to disable all organized military forces). Towards the end things become increasingly more cliched. Not a terrible watch but some FX aside this could be a made for Sci-Fi movie. Still, if you are a sucker for ET (like I am) you may want to brave this one anyway. If nothing else it gives you an excuse to eat a bowl of popcorn in front of the TV.

96 Minutes (2011)

What starts out as a couple knuckleheads pulling a gang inspired prank of boosting a car turns into something far more serious when two witnesses get involved. This is a movie that for the most part is supposed to take place over, you guessed it, 96 minutes. They use flashbacks to provide background and wrap things up months later. This was a surprisingly good drama and illustrates how a couple bad decisions can quickly escalate to something you can't escape from. This would be a great movie for preteens to see before they start hanging around the wrong crowd. Not quite the caliber of Alpha Dog (2006) or Havoc (2005), but chews the same dirt. Some reviews make this sound like a racist movie, I didn't see that at all.. although like all movies there are stereotypes.. enjoy this one for what it is instead of what it isn't. While the final scene lacks a knockout punch, the message it sends is no less relevant.

The Divide (2011)

When a nuclear explosion sends the survivors of a tenement building into the basement to survive they find their horrors have just began. This is Survive meets Lord of the Flies but post nuclear holocaust style. They throw a curve at you that sort of marks a turning point in the movie, but they leave the audience to wonder (as the players do) about the exact nature of the event, except that there is no help coming. The movie brings up the same issues that the two above mentioned movies do about morality, survival and civilized behavior, but doesn't dwell on them or get pushy (like the 5 minutes of Piggy crying over his broken glasses in Flies) but is considerably more graphic. There are a few places the drama grates- a couple of the characters are annoying as hell- but not bad enough to turn it off. Over all an entertaining if rather dark viewing experience. Call it leftover spaghetti that you are eating because there is nothing else in the fridge and you don't feel like cooking.

Wrath of the Titans (2012)

This is a continuation of Clash of the Titans (2010) and takes place about a decade or so after the slaying of the Kraken. If you didn't see Clash you may want to before seeing this one, its not necessary but it will help you understand a few things in the story they take for granted that the audience will know or remember. Lots of action- absolutely top shelf FX, especially the Cyclops and Magma Warriors. Overall it has the same feel and tempo Clash did, less humor and dialogue, more destruction and screaming. If you enjoyed Clash you should enjoy this. I thought it was entertaining but its like one of those hollow chocolate Easter bunnies.. you know its hollow, but for a second you find yourself wishing it was solid... doesn't make it bad at all, just not as awesome as it could be.

Act of Valor (2012)

Navy Seals protect the US from a group of terrorists trying to sneak in a terrible new weapon. I have read some grief about casting actual Seals in this movie, but for me it is totally unfounded.. no worse than any of the wrestlers or football players or rap stars that have made the jump to the screen. The movie itself is pretty straight forward and a little rough around the edges but for me it added to the whole feel of the movie. This was a straight up double shot of adrenaline right to the pump. A 100% America love it or leave it in your face! You get a look at a dozen or so spec ops toys as well as a feel for just what it is these guys do and who they are. They are the best of us, the best of America. I felt damn proud after watching.. the extraction sequence that kicks the adventure off is one of my favorite scenes in any movie ever. It makes me proud and humbled to know that we don't leave ours behind.. one of the nations guardians winds up in the shit there will be a team of granite chewing bad-asses coming to take them home. I cannot hype this flick enough, go see it today! Highly Recommended.

21 Jump Street (2012)

Another 80's TV series getting re-gifted for the big screen. This is exactly what I was thinking before they unzipped my skull and threw sprinkles on my brain. I will go out on a limb and say this is the funniest movie I've seen this year that you don't need ID to see. And this is the good comedy, not that limp noodle Will the anti comedy Ferrell bull puckey. Well put together and without a doubt aimed at those of us in the age bracket to had been watching 21 Jump Street during its initial series run (did it go into syndication? hell I don't know). Very well played with a special nod to Ice Cube for his 'embrace your stereotype'.. lol.. be on the lookout for the eyebrow mustache.. you will know it when you see it. As for the rest its like going to your HS reunion as Rick O'Cassick. Watch for a surprise cameo to wrap up the previous chapter. Call this wonder punch and coconut shrimp. Recommended.

Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance (2011)

Johnny Blaze is back as the flaming skeleton of judgement. If you liked the first one or are a fan of the character there is no reason to think you won't enjoy this second helping. I found the story to be better developed this time around and Nick Cage does a good job of projecting both despair and madness over the creature he has become. FX are about what you would expect and they manage to fit a couple scenes in to tickle your funny bone as they turn up the heat on the action. With any luck they will round this one out as a trilogy.

The Grey (2011)

Survivors of a plane crash in Alaska struggle to stay alive. This is what I consider a 'physical' film.. much of it relies on visual gimmicks and drawing scenes out for tension, which this film does very well. There are a couple places where you can almost feel what the characters are. There isn't much story or character development, in fact outside of two of the characters all you know about any of them is a name that may be shouted a couple times. But its really not necessary for this kind of movie. This is the movie equivalent of a carnival ride.. strap in.. try not to look at the carny too hard.. and enjoy the ride. There are a couple big cheats and gaffs but you probably won't notice until after the movie is over. Deep fried carnival food on a stick.. fun to eat but not doing your system a lot of good. So enjoy the adrenaline rush and let your brain take the night off.

John Carter (2012)

A tired warrior on late 19th century Earth, John Carter finds himself transported to Mars where he is looked to as the savior of the planet. Despite its sci-fi theme Mars looks a lot like Arizona! This is a fairly standard Disney formula movie.. no real complex character issues, the story line is straight forward with minimal curves, headstrong female lead and naive boy scout male lead. Now don't confuse this with the movie being boring, its anything but! Lots of action, tension, the right amounts of apprehension and suspense that actually get better as it moves along. All around a very well done and enjoyable family friendly movie. Unfortunately I think movie goers who didn't read the novels as a kid will find this extraterrestrial jaunt rather plain and old fashioned by comparison to recent fare. A shame too because this really is one of science fictions milestones. Recommended.

The Thing (2011)

An alien doppelganger is discovered in Antarctica and unless a small team of scientists can keep it quarantined it may spell the end of the human race! I thought this was going to be a reboot of John Carpenter's The Thing (1982) but its not, its a prequel that fits very nicely on top of the 82 version (making it a natural double header). If this will be your first exposure to The Thing then I would say you are in for quite the critter FX experience. There are of course gaffs but I like to chalk that up to the nature of the beast (movies), as well as time constraints. The standard issue flame throwers will have to be overlooked as well..lol.. and you have some cliche's where this group of supposedly intelligent people can't seem to agree on what is obvious to us regular viewing folks. But this is failing you will find in nearly all movies of this type, on the up side the players work well and the tempo stays brisk. I enjoyed it and although I was less than thrilled with it as a reboot, I am more than satisfied with it as a 'part one'. For old school sci-fi/monster movie fans this will take you back to those Saturday afternoon creature feature marathons.

The Guard (2011)

An Irish country cop has a new partner, F.B.I. agents, and an international drug smuggling ring dropped into his tea and screws up an otherwise lovely morning. This is comedy the way I like it, dry and rapid fire. Sort of a Beverly Hills Cop in reverse where the straight man is the transplant and the rest of the world is wacky. Everything comes in just the right portions of comedy, drama, action and warm fuzzy tacked on the end. The language is Irish and what else would it be ya fucking cunt! If that doesn't throw you off then this may be a good choice for those looking for something light but not without intelligence. Definitely a feel good film. Highly recommended.

Another Earth (2011)

A young girl bound for MIT causes a felony drunk driving fatality. This story has been told many times, a horrible tragedy with one life consumed by grief and the other by guilt. The first thing you should realize is this is a drama, not a sci-fi movie. The 'other earth' provides a cool backdrop but really doesn't become a factor until the end of the film. What you do get is top shelf presentation by all parties and a very moving portrayal of penance. This is one that will benefit from quiet and thoughtful viewing. If you are looking for something that's moving without costing you a fortune in tissue this would be a great choice. A very slick twist on a time worn theme. Recommended.

The Rite (2011)

The Vatican is seeking exorcists to deal with an upswing in demonic possessions. This is a well written and well played drama that is fairly entertaining. This is less a horror movie than it is a story of interpersonal faith with scary overtones. There is no graphic scenes of violence or gore, the actual scenes of possession, with the exception of the finale', are understated and rely on dialogue and delivery over FX. What makes this movie appeal to me was the discussions of faith and 'truth' and how these could and do intersect. Don't worry there are no drawn out monologues or slobbering blubbery. I think this film would have benefited from another 15 minutes to explore some topics that were hinted at that may have found their way to the cutting room floor. If you want a thoughtful drama with a mild tingle this wouldn't be a bad pick. One thing I did find very refreshing was the portrayal of the priests as human beings.. don't get a lot of that these days.

Bunraku (2010)

A stranger comes to town looking for revenge on the areas most powerful warlord. This is a stylized retelling of 'man without a name' in a post apocalyptic future where guns are 'banned' and ruthless crime lords rule the lands. How much you enjoy this one is almost entirely based on your ability or willingness to suspend belief and let the movie deliver every aspect of its skewed, primary color, story board style vision.. sort of a mash up of Edward Scissorhands (1990), Sin City (2005), and Kill Bill (2003-04). The action is near non stop set over minimalistic cartoonish backdrops. The fighting is highly choreographed, the 'bad guys' are over the top and the good guys aren't really good, they just don't like the bad guys. A lot of mindless fun and testosterone in 118 minutes of mayhem.

Don't Be Afraid of the Dark (2010)

Big old house, hidden basement, scary evil secret. I was roundly disappointed by this one. Nearly every horror movie cliche' shows up and there is a point fairly early in the movie where if the 'average' person couldn't realize something was horribly wrong they should be sterilized. I'm also starting to realize that Katie Holmes can't act for shit. I don't know what audience they were trying to reach with this one but for the serious horror fan this is a pretty thin sandwich. If you have seen Cat's Eye (1985) this views much like an expanded version of the 3rd story 'The General' with a little sauce on it to hide the similarities. You won't die if you decide to see this anyway, but much like going out to a French restaurant be prepared to hit a Burger King on the way home.

Drive (2011)

A part time wheel man finds himself in deep shit when a pawn shop robbery nets 10 million dollars and the ire of the local wise guy. This is a very easy watch.. no complex story elements or plot twists, no boring character development. Its almost like watching a John Hughes film without the brat pack. Very 80's tempo soundtrack and boy meets girl story that gets kicked over when a third returns to the scene. Things quickly head south from there and our hero must remain true to his macho urges despite what should have been long odds. There are a couple scenes of fairly realist and graphic violence with accompanying sound FX. WARNING: if you are squeamish one scene may send you running to the bathroom (if this is you when the guy with the mangled hands shows up in the Pizzaria go find something to do for about 2 minutes). Nice easy entertainment with a little white hat bad boy macho thrown in for flavor. Recommended.

Apollo 18 (2011)

The 'real' reason Apollo 18 was the last manned mission to the moon. Great premise, lackluster delivery. Shot in the now tiresome "I was there" self filming technique made famous by a Witch movie that will go unnamed, that is supposed to add to the 'realism', but not so much when you have 3rd person shots to show off your set. Coupled with the notion astronauts don't have a light source other than the flash on a camera (oO) so they can set up a 'gotcha' moment so telegraphed that when it landed the sheer not scariness of it makes you want to scream out of frustration, it just comes in light. There are other huge problems as well but lets move on to the other side of the coin. Everyone likes conspiracies and this one hands up a whopper dripping with all the 'powers that be' slime sauce you can stomach. They do borrow from Red Planet (2000) for the antagonist with just enough of the detail tweaked as so to be able to deny it in case of lawsuit (not the robot). Overall this plays like a good ScyFy production.. as far as seeing it on the big screen, maybe the bottom of a double header at the drive in (do they still have those?) Fish fingers too long under the light and a flat cola.

Colombiana (2011)

The little girl of a South American drug lord is the sole survivor of a hit order on her family and comes to America sworn to avenge them. Featuring the very hot Zoe Saldana in the title role [Star Trek (2009), Avatar (2009)] this femme fatale is unstoppable as the one woman killing machine named after a flower. Very cool action, slick twists in old themes and the obligatory glimpses of skin keep things fairly tight throughout.. I did catch my attention wandering in a few places, mostly during long monologues, but they are relatively few. I thought the ending was fantastic, definitely within character and pulling an appreciative laugh from me. If you enjoyed The Mechanic (2011) for more than Jason Stratham you should enjoy this one as well.

Stake Land (2010)

Its Vampires that over run the world with this one. The same basic set up as Zombieland (2009) with the first person narrative presentation and the make up 2 main characters.. but thats where it ends. I was pleasantly surprised by this one, the title and the first 5 minutes didn't have me expecting much. While there is some humor in this one, its not a comedy by any stretch. FX are about what you would expect from a movie not getting a million dollars worth of media hype. This was a well told story that was much darker than what we have come to expect from similar fare. While this may miss the mainstream, I could easily see a cult following. If you are tired of cute fluffy vegan vampires and long for the days of bloody nasty horrifying ones, this is your ticket. There are some very cool twists in this one, and I could see elements from 30 Days of Night (2007), 28 Weeks Later (2007), and any number of post apocalyptic movies where humans still prey on each other. For fans of the genre, very worth your time. Recommended.

Death and Cremation (2010)

One is a loner by choice, the other by his peers.. one is a serial killer, the other is about to make a friend. This is one fun dark twisty, definitely not to be viewed with a critical eye, but with a measure of insight and social commentary none-the-less. The bullied loner is chased out of the house and told to find a job.. the local neighborhood discount crematorium seems just the place. The gore is minimal, but there is some as well as brief clips of realistic violence. No need to watch half the movie to get the flavor, its well displayed in the first 10 minutes so if this isn't you, your evening isn't shot.. I know I'm a sick bastage so I laughed more than a few times with this one. My only complaint is how the ending came together, but it had to end somehow I guess. Definitely not family viewing unless your name is Addams.

Fright Night (2011)

Like the original the unlikely hero finds himself living next door to a sinister vampire who has found a way to blend in. Unlike the original everyone soon believes Charlie. This isn't a bad movie on its own, but as a horror movie it comes in a little light. Think of this more like a sanitary version of From Dusk Till Dawn (1996). Some of the dialogue is clever and action is sufficient to make things fairly watchable. There is no overt stupidity which is refreshing. Take it for what it is, another luke warm Hollyweird production. Make it a rental.

Red State (2011)

Three teens answer a sex ad and find themselves captured by the local cult. This one sets up like a slasher movie but quickly evolves into a much more mature and darker film. The buzz sets this as Kevin Smiths most 'mature' work yet, and I must admit the dark satire is well done and slathered on very thick in places with a couple very clever twists. A good crew of journeyman players on this one, most notably a rather sickly looking John Goodman (hope you are okay John cause we luv ya out here). If you aren't familiar with Kevin's politics (the Silent Bob look would be good for him) it may be a good idea to stay away from them before seeing this movie (otherwise there are portions that come across as cheap and petty). No doubt about it this is a film worth seeing if you are a fan of dark satire, top shelf effort by Mr. Smith.